Why hello there, I didn't see you coming.
Have you had a nice meal yet? Did you have Green Giant sweetcorn hoping that you'd be a giant one day?
Or did you try to be manly by doing the cinnamon challenge?
Or are just being a complete arsehole by doing the knife song?
A KNIFE IS FOR f*cking CUTTING CAKE AND THEN EATING THE f*cking CAKE
Just a general message to stop stupid knife song idiots.
Do you look at the sky and imagine My little ponies? I sure do. They are just amazing, lovely and...
NO, JUST STFU, PONIES ARE FOR LITTLE MIDGETS, NOT FOR GROWN ASS MEN WHO WANT TO CUDDLE AROUND THE TELLY WITH THEIR DAUGHTERS THAT ARE CHAINED TO THE KITCHEN AND WATCH MY FUDGING LITTLE BALONIES.
Enough about that. Wait, do you seriously still, ride that tricycle?! Man, just bin it already!
AND BREATHE.....
So, are you an avid buyer of BB pellets? Yes you are.
Do you buy from JBBG? Are you trying to say no? DON'T LIE TO MEH YOU SILLY BOY OF COURSE WE ALL DO!
And what do you specifically buy from JBBG? LPEGs? Orange pooped guns? So called "Pro Guns"?
Lovely products aren't they?
But more specifically, you know that I know that you know that we all know that, we all have this urge in us.
We all have this urge...... TO BUY JBBG APPROVED BULLDOG BB PELLETS THAT CLAIM TO HAVE HIGH PERFORMANCE!
AND DON'T LIE TO MEH! WE ALL DO! WE LOVE 'EM!
But have you noticed recently that they are quite inaccurate? Do they curve off to the left or right often? I know, they are starting to be a huge let down now.
So what is happening to them is what you want to know. That's why i'm here to find out for you!
So, one ordinary day, I went to my locals to buy some good, trust worthy JBBG Bulldogs like we all do and I bought a tub of 5000 .20g BB pellets! That will be plenty to last for a while!
Sooooo! This is what they claim about their Bulldogs: These 0.20g 6mm Bulldog BB Pellets have been designed to optimise the performance of all Airsoft BB Guns including; Co2 operated, Airsoft BB Guns with Hop Up, Shotguns, Single shot Rifles, most good quality entry level BB Guns and High end (AEG) Electric Rifles.
These BB Pellets are calibrated and have a smooth polished surface, with no ridges or imperfections making this product the best you can buy for your 6mm Arsoft BB Gun.
Sounds very appealing eh? Smooth..... polished surface.... with.... no... ridges... or.... imperfections...... I'm sure you'd love that with your Mrs.
But the fact is, they claim to be the best bb pellets for your gun which we have all believed for some time.
But let me show you this....
As soon as you look at that picture, you think, "Hmmmm, that is a highly polished standard JBBG Bulldog pellet with no seams or imperfections what so ever and I swear on my life that this is true."
Yes, that is true on the outside of the BB pellet, it does actually look well done aesthetically.
But it was time to get the tools out to crack them open.
This is my tool to do the job.
It is a small multi-tool which can be hooked to your keyring and has 12 functions and as you can all see, there are a pair of pliers and cutters in the middle.
On the right side, as you can see, there is a nail filer, scissors and 2 screw drivers.
And on the left side, you can see a can opener with a flat head screw driver on it, another flat head screw driver, this "prod" thingy which I don't know, and another can opener with a rather sharp point at the end maybe for box and letter opening.
So I used the pliers to break the bb pellet open and get ready to see the inevitable for you JBBG Bulldog loving fans.
LOOK! SEE THERE?! THAT IS CLEARLY A MAHOOSIVE AIR BUBBLE RIGHT THERE! SOMETHING YOU NEVER WANTED TO SEE!
Are you in denial? You're probably thinking, "Nawwww, that's just 1 bb pellet, I'm pretty sure the best brand for BB pellets which is Bulldog would make a mistake once in a while, no need to worry."
BUT WAIT!
HERE IS ANOTHER ONE!
THAT IS CLEARLY ANOTHER MAHOOSIVE AIR BUBBLE RIGHT IN THE CENTRE OF THE BB PELLET!
And you are definitely thinking, "This can't be! The best brand for BB pellets has imperfections on their products?! No.... THIS CANNAE BE! THIS CANNAE BE!!!!!!"
WELL, It's all true! They claim it to be the best but there are imperfections.
This doesn't mean that most of their BB pellets are imperfections, I mean, what I mean to say was,
THEY ARE ALL IMPERFECTIONS, THEY CONTAIN THE SWINE FLU! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! BURN IT ALL!
And I know, this may be all of a sudden to you.
Hush, I know how you feel.
You spent all of your life savings to buy 5000 tubs of Bulldog BB pellets and you now know they are unreliable. There, there. I know what this means to you.
YOU GOTTA BURN 'EM ALL YA SILLEH BOY!
So that is why I'm telling all you heartbroken JBBG loving fans that Bulldog BB pellets are bad.
And I know what you are thinking, "So...... *sobs*..... where will... *sniffs*.... I buy BB pellets now... *sniff*.....?
Well, what I recommend to all of you, and you all may not know this, but, I recommend you to use BB pellets made by the brand Blaster or ASG.
So, you should now know that to never trust what JBBG recommends as you have all done so for the past few years. You all can now move on and buy Blasters.
I bid you farewell and happy buying. AND GO TO THE MINING FIELD AND EARN BACK THE MONEY YOU WASTED ON BULLDOGS!
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That's right folks! 0.12g! The best weight of BB pellets for your airsoft gun!
They are highly polished and are guaranteed to have maximum performance for your AEG!
So come on over and purchase BB pellets from your favourite brand!
http://justbbguns.co.uk/product/510/BB-PELLETS/286/.12G-BULLDOG/609/0.12G-5000-NEW-TUB
Every £5 you spend will come with a complimentary bag of bullshit!
Happy buying folks!
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