Upon arriving at my friend Jen’s house on Friday, I took my shoes off and realized I had put on mismatched socks.
So was the morning. The night before, the kids were awake constantly, so at 4am, I just decided to get up for the day. By 7am, I was exhausted and crabby. Isaiah’s teacher came around 8am, and kept telling me, “I don’t know how you do it.” At 9am, she left, and I had all three children lined up upstairs for diaper changes (no, Samarah is not potty trained yet), clothing changes, and then, of course, meltdowns for one reason or another.
I was supposed to be at Jen’s around 10:30am, but around 9:40am, I texted her, “Do you care if we come now? I just can’t already with today.”
Like any great friend, she responded, “Of course.”
I got them all into the car, and then like magic, as soon as we arrived, I felt so much better.
Except, well, mismatched socks.
Mismatched Socks
We laughed about the socks because my mama friends totally get it.
A couple hours later, I rushed the kids out of Jen’s house. We had to get home to get the two oldest down for naps so that I could focus on Amiya’s new social worker visit.
The social worker came, left (and by the way, the new social worker is our Adoptions worker and she’s really great!), and about that time, Amiya was so tired that I put her in the swing to sleep. I grabbed a Kombucha and just sat.
And stared blankly.
And thought about mismatched socks.
I used to have it so together. Like, for real. I was never dropping balls. My schedule was in perfect shape. People rarely wondered if I’d make it through the day.
And now, just mismatched socks, little, black leggings, and big old sweatshirts complete with spit up and someone’s boogers.
The culmination of my mismatched socks realization reminded me of all the things I’m working on in my life, the thoughts that have been running so rampantly through my mind, and the changes I have made and am about to make.
Like for instance….I made a huge change for my health when I decided to almost completely give up coffee (for the record, it’s helped make incredible progress already). I made another huge change by using my nanny less (I know, it sounds super counterproductive for me during this season). Simultaneously, I decided to begin kicking fear where it belongs – to the curb, out of my life (there are so many parts and pieces to this that it will require a separate blog post). And even with the chaos of daily mismatched socks, I am working to prioritize more time for daily workouts and a weekly Bikram session.
When the kid’s woke up from their naps, I started the process over, beginning with lining them up for diaper and clothing changes. Then I placed Amiya in the pouch (aka Ergobaby), Isaiah and Samarah in the stroller and we ventured out for a nice, long walk.
And all along, I decided to just keep the mismatched socks on because I am learning that sometimes when things are the most chaotic and mismatched, we learn to crawl out and around them in a whole new (and dare I say, better?!) way.
It’s totally going to be okay.
Xox,
SKH
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