Armies:
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==Armies==
==Armies==
−
Games of TLotRSBG always take place between two armies: good and evil. No exceptions. There is, luckily enough, more than enough flavor to go between divided between the forces.
+
Games of TLotRSBG always take place between two armies: good and evil. No exceptions. There is, luckily enough, more than enough flavor to go between divided between the forces
, and some very loose rules for allies within each side
.
===Forces of Good===
===Forces of Good===
−
*Arnor
.
A FUCKHUEG number of archers. They can take 4 rangers for every Ranger of the North or Dunedain in the contingent. Also includes several heroes that are important to Aragorn's back story.
+
*
'''
Arnor
:'''
A FUCKHUEG number of archers. They can take 4 rangers for every Ranger of the North or Dunedain in the contingent. Also includes several heroes that are important to Aragorn's back story.
−
*The Shire. The closest thing the good guys will ever have to meatshields,
but for
some
reason they can shoot as good as
the
elves
.
+
*
'''
The Shire
:'''
.
Hobbits! Hobbits everywhere!
The closest thing the good guys will ever have to meatshields,
Hobbits are slow and barely strong enough to hurt each other, let alone the enemy. They have
some
amusing heroes (Frodo's post-dropping-
the
-Ring-into-Mount-Doom form makes for some hilarious [[troll]]ing) and are surprisingly accurate with their pebble toss attacks, but are still a pretty suicidal choice
.
−
*The Fellowship
.
A good source of powerful heroes, but they shouldn't all be taken at once.
+
*
'''
The Fellowship
:'''
A good source of powerful heroes, but they shouldn't all be taken at once.
−
*Eregion & Rivendell
.
The [[High Elves]] will fuck your shit up. Highly skilled warriors, some of the deadliest heroes in the game, and Cavalry that makes you roll for [[Anal Circumference]]. Their obvious downside is their high cost.
+
*
'''
Eregion & Rivendell
:'''
The [[High Elves]] will fuck your shit up. Highly skilled warriors, some of the deadliest heroes in the game, and Cavalry that makes you roll for [[Anal Circumference]]. Their obvious downside is their high cost.
−
*Lothlorien & Mirkwood
.
Though not as tough as their High Elven cousins, the Wood Elves will fuck you up from range. The deadliest archers on the side of good, they are just as deadly in combat as their High Elven cousins, they're just not as good at taking the pain.
+
*
'''
Lothlorien & Mirkwood
:'''
Though not as tough as their High Elven cousins, the Wood Elves will fuck you up from range. The deadliest archers on the side of good, they are just as deadly in combat as their High Elven cousins, they're just not as good at taking the pain.
−
*Rohan
.
FUCK YEAH LAND-BOUND VIKING CAVALRY. If you play Rohan and you don't field your entire army on horseback, you're doing it wrong. Rohan has awesome light cavalry, and everyone gets bonuses to their Toughness for having shields, regardless of whether they have bows. They also have throwing weapons everywhere, half a dozen named asskickers in their main list, and get bonues for avoiding obstacles while on horseback. Their downside is that they tend to get swarmed due to their large bases and (relatively) small numbers.
+
*
'''
Rohan
:'''
FUCK YEAH LAND-BOUND VIKING CAVALRY. If you play Rohan and you don't field your entire army on horseback, you're doing it wrong. Rohan has awesome light cavalry, and everyone gets bonuses to their Toughness for having shields, regardless of whether they have bows. They also have throwing weapons everywhere, half a dozen named asskickers in their main list, and get bonues for avoiding obstacles while on horseback. Their downside is that they tend to get swarmed due to their large bases and (relatively) small numbers.
−
*Gondor
.
Despite having to call for [[AIDS|aid]], they are tough badasses. Heavily armored, a large number of warriors to choose from, heavy cavalry and King Elessar himself, Gondor is not to be underestimated. Other armies of note include the Rangers of Ithilien (guys from the end of the second movie), the Army of the Dead from the third, and the beautiful Fiefdoms list, consisting of some amazing heavy cavalry and the only pikes in the armies of good, monster-slaying archers, halberdiers lead by a [[Nurgle|gigantic fatass]], and SCOTSMEN WITH FUCKHUEG SWORDS.
+
*
'''
Gondor
:'''
Despite having to call for [[AIDS|aid]], they are tough badasses. Heavily armored, a large number of warriors to choose from, heavy cavalry and
[[Rape|Aragon
King Elessar himself
]]
, Gondor is not to be underestimated. Other armies of note include the Rangers of Ithilien (guys from the end of the second movie), the Army of the Dead from the third, and the beautiful Fiefdoms list, consisting of some amazing heavy cavalry and the only pikes in the armies of good, monster-slaying archers, halberdiers lead by a [[Nurgle|gigantic fatass]], and SCOTSMEN WITH FUCKHUEG SWORDS.
−
*The [[Dwarf_Fortress|Dwarven Holds]]
.
The Dwarves in LotR are tough little fucks. Nearly impossible to wound with ranged weapons and only killable in combat with lucky hits, prepare for long drawn-out battles against Durin's Folk. Costed somewhere in between the Gondorians and the High Elves, Dwarves have the ability to outlast most of your enemies due to their insano toughness. Fun to note is that though they have become the arch-blueprint of what it means to be a Dwarf, they themselves use swords and bows, un-Dwarven weapons to the same people who threw [[Skub|raging bitchfits]] at that one picture from the Hobbit movie showcasing the Dwarves.
+
*
'''
The [[Dwarf_Fortress|Dwarven Holds]]
:'''
The Dwarves in LotR are tough little fucks. Nearly impossible to wound with ranged weapons and only killable in combat with lucky hits, prepare for long drawn-out battles against Durin's Folk. Costed somewhere in between the Gondorians and the High Elves, Dwarves have the ability to outlast most of your enemies due to their insano toughness. Fun to note is that though they have become the arch-blueprint of what it means to be a Dwarf, they themselves use swords and bows, un-Dwarven weapons to the same people who threw [[Skub|raging bitchfits]] at that one picture from the Hobbit movie showcasing the Dwarves.
−
*Numenor
.
Basically one type of warrior and a few heroes. [[Derp|For some reason you can field Aragorn alongside Isildur]].
+
*
'''
Numenor
'''
Basically one type of warrior and a few heroes. [[Derp|For some reason you can field Aragorn alongside Isildur]].
−
*The
Wonderers
in the Wild
.
These are the heroes not fitting in with the other armies, including the Woses, Ents, [[Troll|Tom Bombadil & Goldberry]] and the Eagles. The good guys only source of big critters.
+
*
'''
The
Wanderers
in the Wild
:'''
These are the heroes not fitting in with the other armies, including the Woses, Ents, [[Troll|Tom Bombadil & Goldberry]] and the Eagles. The good guys only source of big critters.
ADDED IN THE HOBBIT
ADDED IN THE HOBBIT
−
*Thorin's Company. Can field a truly retarded amount of powerful but cheap heroes. Also Bilbo. He gets all the perks of the One Ring (invisibility) with none of the downsides [[Rape|(getting mindfucked by Sauron)]]. Make him your general, have him put on the ring and [[Rage|watch your opponent try to kill him]].
+
*
'''
Thorin's Company
:''' Like the Fellowship, but with the adventuring party from The Hobbit instead
. Can field a truly retarded amount of powerful but cheap heroes. Also Bilbo. He gets all the perks of the One Ring (invisibility) with none of the downsides [[Rape|(getting mindfucked by Sauron)]]. Make him your general, have him put on the ring and [[Rage|watch your opponent try to kill him]].
−
*Elrond's Household
.
[[Elves|Poiny-eared bastards]] riding horses. Laughs at the bow limit.
+
*
'''
Elrond's Household
:'''
[[Elves|Poiny-eared bastards]] riding horses. Laughs at the bow limit.
−
*Radagast's Alliance
.
More Eagles. Now in plastic.
+
*
'''
Radagast's Alliance
:'''
More Eagles. Now in plastic.
−
*Army of Thror
.
More alcoholic midgets. The Dwarven Holds [[Imperial Guard|wear cardboard]] in comparison.
+
*
'''
Army of Thror
:'''
More alcoholic midgets. The Dwarven Holds [[Imperial Guard|wear cardboard]] in comparison.
−
*The White Council. Stupid amounts of magic.
+
*
'''
The White Council
:''' All of the wizards
. Stupid amounts of magic.
===Forces of Evil===
===Forces of Evil===
−
*Moria
.
Your prime source for Goblins: though not very tough, brave or strong, you will drown your enemies in a green(ish) tide. Don't forget to open up a can or two of [[troll]]olo on your enemies: they're not very expensive if you use a few. Remember: heroes can be as cheap as 35 points. Use this. Also includes the Balrog and [[Dragon|Dragons]].
+
*
'''
Moria
'''
Your prime source for Goblins: though not very tough, brave or strong, you will drown your enemies in a green(ish) tide. Don't forget to open up a can or two of [[troll]]olo on your enemies: they're not very expensive if you use a few. Remember: heroes can be as cheap as 35 points. Use this. Also includes the Balrog and [[Dragon|Dragons]]
, both of whom are incredibly powerful and hard to kill
.
−
*Isengard
.
[[Meme|Where
the
Hobbits are taken.]] The Uruk-Hai are a force to be reckoned with: with Strength 4 they can punch lesser men to death with ease.
Also,
the
only
force
to use crossbows and
the
only
evil
force to use pikes
,
so make them count
.
+
*
'''
Isengard
:'''
[[Meme|Where Hobbits are taken
to
.]] The Uruk-Hai are a force to be reckoned with: with Strength 4 they can punch lesser men to death with ease.
Their crossbows make them
the
shootiest
force
on
the evil
team
,
capable of outshooting Elven armies in a straight fight, although the Elves still have the advantage of greater range and manoeuvrability. They also have a shit-ton of pikes
.
−
*Mordor
. Less tough than most Good warriors
, [[Orc|Orcs]] rely on numbers to win the day. Unless you start to use the different breeds of Orcs of course: the Morannon Orcs who are stronger and better armored: the Mordor Uruk-Hai who are as strong and bold as their Isengard cousins, and the dreaded Black Guard of Barad-Dûr, who can slay lesser heroes with ease. Not to be overlooked are the Black Men of Númenór, who are a fear-causing and disciplined, albeit pricy, choice. This list has some brilliant heroes, including Sauron himself, the Mouth of Sauron (who got [[Konrad_von_Carstein|butchered like a chump]] in the extended run of Return of the King), Gothmog (he lead the siege on Minas Tirith), Shagrat of Minas Morgul (who with his blonde hair, meat cleaver sword and I FUCK YOU UP attitude is pretty much channeling Viral from the Gurren Lagaan [[anime]]) and the motherfucking [[Nazgûl]].
+
*
'''
Mordor
:''' While not impractically weak like the Moria goblins
, [[Orc|Orcs]]
are still weaker than most good warriors and
rely on numbers to win the day. Unless you start to use the different breeds of Orcs of course: the Morannon Orcs who are stronger and better armored: the Mordor Uruk-Hai who are as strong and bold as their Isengard cousins, and the dreaded Black Guard of Barad-Dûr, who can slay lesser heroes with ease. Not to be overlooked are the Black Men of Númenór, who are a fear-causing and disciplined, albeit pricy, choice. This list has some brilliant heroes, including Sauron himself, the Mouth of Sauron (who got [[Konrad_von_Carstein|butchered like a chump]] in the extended run of Return of the King), Gothmog (he lead the siege on Minas Tirith), Shagrat of Minas Morgul (who with his blonde hair, meat cleaver sword and I FUCK YOU UP attitude is pretty much channeling Viral from the Gurren Lagaan [[anime]]) and the motherfucking [[Nazgûl]].
−
*The Eastern Kingdoms
.
You might remember these as the guys from the second movie who didn't do all that much. They are tough, disciplined and have some pretty kickass characters, including the Dragon Knights and War Priests who use [[Weeaboo_Fightan_Magic|their outlandish weapons and styles to overcome their enemies.]] The others, the [[White_Scars|men of Khand]], are basically [[Genghis_motherfucking_Khan|Mongols]].
+
*
'''
The Eastern Kingdoms
:'''
You might remember these as the guys from the second movie who didn't do all that much. They are tough, disciplined and have some pretty kickass characters, including the Dragon Knights and War Priests who use [[Weeaboo_Fightan_Magic|their outlandish weapons and styles to overcome their enemies.]] The others, the [[White_Scars|men of Khand]], are basically [[Genghis_motherfucking_Khan|Mongols]].
−
*Harad & Umbar
.
There are only a few reasons to take these lists. One, they have pirates. Two, they have Suladân and the [[Tallarn|Serpent Horde]], light-armored warriors with poisoned bows, horses and a fuckton of friends. Three: the War-Mumak of Harad, the biggest non-terrain model GW has ever made outside of Forge World. Also, camel cavalry, half-trolls and ogre men, but who gives a fuck about them?
+
*
'''
Harad & Umbar
:'''
There are only a few reasons to take these lists. One, they have pirates. Two, they have Suladân and the [[Tallarn|Serpent Horde]], light-armored warriors with poisoned bows, horses and a fuckton of friends. Three: the War-Mumak of Harad
(war elephants)
, the biggest non-terrain model GW has ever made outside of Forge World. Also, camel cavalry, half-trolls and ogre men, but who gives a fuck about them?
−
*Angmar
.
Gets all kinds of undead but for some reason no regular ghosts. Mixes these in to make your opponent's warriors shit their pants but suck and die without support. Enter cave trolls and the gloriously cheap and expendable orcs.
+
*
'''
Angmar
:'''
Gets all kinds of undead but for some reason no regular ghosts. Mixes these in to make your opponent's warriors shit their pants but suck and die without support. Enter cave trolls and the gloriously cheap and expendable orcs
.
+
*'''Monsters of Middle-Earth:''' Like the Wanderers in the Wild, but evil; Shelob is the only one you'll have ever heard of
.
ADDED BY THE HOBBIT
ADDED BY THE HOBBIT
−
*Azog's Hunters
.
Orcs, but with twice the attacks and ten times the [[awesome]].
+
*
'''
Azog's Hunters
:'''
Orcs, but with twice the attacks and ten times the [[awesome]].
−
*Goblin Town
.
Compared to the Moria goblins they trade armour for free spears (but only if they're supporting goblins from the same hood. The goblin scribe effectively gives you an infinite supply of goblins, which is handy when you have the Goblin King using them as ammo.
+
*
'''
Goblin Town
:'''
Compared to the Moria goblins they trade armour for free spears (but only if they're supporting goblins from the same hood
)
. The
hilarious
goblin scribe effectively gives you an infinite supply of goblins, which is handy when you have the Goblin King using them as ammo.
−
*The Trolls
.
Those dumbasses that got themselves turned to stone.
+
*
'''
The Trolls
:'''
Those dumbasses that got themselves turned to stone.
==Round-up==
==Round-up==